WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize