Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Randomize
