Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize