I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize