Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
