HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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