I think I am morally bankrupt
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I stole a fireplace last night.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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