I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
