so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
