in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
