he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize