Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
