Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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