I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize