So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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