This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
