Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize