You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
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