I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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