I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Randomize
