I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Randomize
