Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
