i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
