party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
