I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
