I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Randomize
