I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Randomize
