It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
