Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
