been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
