when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
