names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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