True but thats because hes a fetus.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
