Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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