I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
