im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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