I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
