New low: just hacked my moms facebook
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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