I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
