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• (810): View more from Michigan

  I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.

  (1-810): View more from Michigan

  Holy shittt I don't even have a bf

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.

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• (914): View more from New York

  For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.

  (1-914): View more from New York

  That's cute.

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• (310): View more from California

  When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth

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• (925): View more from California

  we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself

  (707): View more from California

  dude you teach first grade wtf

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.

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• (949): View more from California

  And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers

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• (406): View more from Montana

  fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke

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• (585): View more from New York

  this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.

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