Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I would ride that face into the sunset
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
