Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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