Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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