do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
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