escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
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