The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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