so explain again why im purple
no
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize