After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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