Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
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