Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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