she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Houston, we have a squirter
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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