She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
