Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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